When life hands you lemons...

... hand the lemons back and demand to see life's manager.

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Conversations

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This is all from a conversation I've had with someone I mentioned in this blog awhile ago.  It seems surreal to me that we can talk so freely about the stuff we couldn't talk about ten years ago.  Then again, I was letting the conversation happen, so what does that say about me?  Why am I taking these deep breaths?  Why is my heart beating faster? I'm going to blame the coffee and an empty stomach.  Or maybe the too tight jeans that I shouldn't have worn.  That makes much more sense and I like that explanation much better.  There's nothing deep seeded here.  Nothing.  Why is it that he's always the one to message me first?  I still don't know how to interpret that. I should have started copying/pasting much earlier in the conversation.  The first part sounds bad.  We were talking about a time about 11 years ago when I'd hopped a Greyhound to see him in college for a week. I'm wondering if he was patronizing me (or just being drunk) toward the e
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At the check-out line

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Is It Really A Wonder?

A friend of mine left a comment on a recent blog saying that it's no wonder I haven't broken down yet. She said that I've been through a lot lately. This could be true (I'm not discrediting her) but I see it as me just living my life, dealing and handling what's been given to me. I know that the people who count have the faith in me that I need. When I was in boot camp, I was being strong for all those girls who were away from their families for the first time. They'd cry and sob and cry some more, everyday wondering if they'd made the right choice. Every time, I was there, helping them through it. I'd been away from my family before (five months after graduation) and was just fine then. I didn't cry during those five months. I suppose, while in boot camp, when I thought it was safe, I broke down a bit and cried; I missed my mother and my friends. I was actually really fucking disappointed that they didn't write as often as they said they would.
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