Friday, September 30, 2011

A story prompt today

I stood at the back door waiting for the sun to set.  I was hoping for the night to come.  I need to draw down the moon's power to infuse my body with her light.  It seemed like the night would never come.  Patience helped me wait it out and at long last, the sky was dark, the stars were out, and the moon was shining in her pregnant glory.

I stood out in the field, my arms outstretched, basking in the light that shone down upon me.  I chanted the Goddess invocation and allowed the vibrations of the earth to surge right through me.  My energy was renewed. I felt like a new woman and I was ready to take on whatever lay ahead of me.

Thursday, September 29, 2011

My Writing Goal

I want to write one book.  Just one.  I want it published by Penguin Publishing or Tor or somebody who publishes my favorite authors.  I've been working on a story since 2004.  I keep getting more ideas for it and then I write and write and then I stop.  Life happens to keep me from working on it more.  Work keeps me busy, as well as school; not to mention my Belladonna.

One day I will finish it.  Those who've read it so far are anxiously waiting to read more.  It's been awhile since they read anything, but I know they haven't forgotten.  They really like the story.  I just need to finish it.  I also need to find it.  I'm hoping that I still have it located on the laptop I'm currently using.

Really, Mom?

I don't think my mother realizes that we have different priorities and different things going on than my sister.

It seems as though my sister will always have a good opportunity to get photos of my nephew done.  That's great as I enjoy seeing pictures of him.  However, it feels like my mother is hounding me for "professional" pictures of my daughter.  "I like the silly ones, but..." is what I see a lot from her on Facebook.

I'm sorry I don't get photos of my daughter all the time.  Yes, I married a photographer, but we have busy lives with work and school full time.  Doing professional photos of our daughter for my mother (or anyone else in our extended family) are not our top priority.  She's also asking for recent pictures of my bonus son.  The most recent pictures WE HAVE are from our last visit almost three years ago.

I really wish she'd stop.  It seems like she's comparing me to my sister.  Maybe it's just me over-reacting, but that's what it feels like.  My sister seems to be able to get professional photos done for my nephew for his birthday and a couple of other times during the year.  I'm sure my mother would love these, too, but we can't.  Even going to the photo place in Wally World isn't going to happen.  When I'm not at work, I'm at school.  When I'm not at school, I'm at work.  When I'm not at either place, I'm at home relaxing or doing homework.  The last place I want to be when I'm not working is AT WORK.

Sometimes I wonder if I should just NOT do photos of her at all OR if/when we do get professional photos done, not sending them to my mother.  She's been pushy about things.  At least, that's how it seems to me.

I don't remember if I posted this on my blog three months ago, so here it is.. again.


Mom
Gonna spend the day scanning photos and getting my duds ready for the ren fest tomorrow.5 hours ago · 
    • Sister The zoo opens back up July 1st, I have Darion most of the time between July 8th - 17th, just saying, the zoo is about all we have here. I will have to double check my dates but I think it's about right.
      5 hours ago · 


    • Mom Okay. I am not making any plans until next week. I thinkg I may go to Illinois for the 4th then up to see you and Darion (& Dan).
      5 hours ago · 


    • Sister Good luck seeing Dan. He has been working a lot lately.
      5 hours ago · 


    • Mom Life is never easy and it is always an adjustment to the new avenues we walk. The ability to adapt to new situations means the ability to survive whatever life throws at you. Eventually you will have more time with Dan.
      5 hours ago · 


    • Mom Sorry - didn't mean to sound preachy. I've been working on my life coaching business and that just fell out.
      5 hours ago · 


    • Sister I was just letting you know you won't see much of him. I wasn't complaining.
      5 hours ago · 


    • Mom Okay. Love you.
      5 hours ago · 


    • Sister Love you too. Thanks for planning a trip to see us.
      5 hours ago · 


    • Sister It's not the 8th, it's the 11th through the following weekend
      4 hours ago · 


    • Mom Then I think I will go to Illinois for the 4th, maybe hit Ohio, then come see you.
      4 hours ago · 

    • Me Have fun!
      2 hours ago · 


    • Mom Maybe I can make it to Texas for Bella's birthday
      14 minutes ago · 

    • Me If you can that would be great; I know Bella misses her Mimi.
      about a minute ago · 

    • Me But don't worry about it if you can't.
      about a minute ago · 


      Oh, and that bit where she thinks she's "preachy?"  Yeah, she really doesn't talk like that.  She's trying to make herself feel better and important.
      She also recently resigned as a bus driver for RTD.  She JUST got that job.  I guess she made the mistake of NOT asking the bus drivers just how taxing it is on their bodies (why she resigned/quit this job).  If she did that, she wouldn't have even bothered applying for it.  The longest job she's held was her military service; aside from that, she hasn't held onto a job longer than maybe five years.  Granted, I haven't had one longer than two, but if we'd been able to stay in San Diego, I'd still have the job I left (and had been employed for almost four years).
      I'm not going to pretend to be happy that she feels that "maybe" she'll grace us with her presence AFTER I commented on her status.  I don't think that I should.

Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Feeling guilty (today's prompt)

Sometimes I feel guilty when I want to hang out outside of the home with friends.  Then again, while I do have friends here, there isn't the extra cash flow to do those things.  I don't think I spend enough time at home with my family.  I shouldn't want to go out and away from them and I feel guilty when I do.

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

I allow myself

I allow myself the freedom to be me.  I'm the only one like me and there is pride in that.

I started wearing glitter to work every day a few months ago.  Now, my customers can't wait to see what I do.  They love to see how I've done my eye makeup for the day.  This helps me to stand out to be me.  There are others who do fun things with their eye makeup at work, but apparently, I stand out.  This makes me happy and I feel good.

Monday, September 26, 2011

Neurotic?

A characteristic that I have that resembles my mother.. I'm not even sure where to start.

The importance of friends

My friends are incredibly important to me.  They accept and love me no matter what.  My husband is my best friend.

A story?

I have no idea what kind of story this could be.  I'm not -that- creative.

Thursday, September 22, 2011

Enjoyable time with The Girl, Bella

One of my favorite times with Bella was actually a day when we weren't feeling very well.  We snuggled and cuddled all day.  I think she fell asleep on me at one point.

I miss her falling asleep on me.  She did it so much when she was a baby.  Sometimes I miss her being a baby.

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

At the check-out line

I posted this on a social networking site and the comments took the post in a direction I had not intended.  So, I'm "moving" the original post here, along with only my comments (edited).


One thing that cashiers in any store would love for customers to have is etiquette at the check-out line.  
Oftentimes, customers are on the phone having a conversation while the cashier is trying to do their job.  They can't do it accurately unless they're able to talk and conversate with you.  Please, put down the phone (tell the person on the other end you'll call them back) and respond to your cashier.
Also, some cashiers are just naturally bubbly and in a good mood.  If you're having a bad day or are in a bad mood, the cashier can tell and they want to help you make your day a better one.  Not all cashiers are like this, but I am.  It actually hurts my feelings a bit when I ask, "Hi there!  How are you today?" and all I get is a grunt and a sour puss face.
Another thing is letting your kids be rowdy.  If you're letting your child get a candy or a toy that's stationed in the check-out line, have them put the item on the conveyor belt to be rung up with everything else.  When children thrust their item in front of everything else, it's considered (by most people) to be rude.  I don't think I'll be ringing up anyone in this group at my store, but, when kids do this in my line, I'll take the item and put it on the conveyor belt.  Certain grocery items need to be bagged together and this becomes difficult when a candy or toy is getting shoved out in front.  
This can also be a safety issue.  The child's arm or hand could get caught between some of your items and the cash register, causing harm to the child.
There isn't a set of written guideline for going through the check-out line, but there are many cashiers who feel there is a need for check-out etiquette.  Doing your best to follow these guidelines will make your visit more enjoyable and your cashier happy.
This isn't etiquette, but something that other cashiers have brought up to me (they work at different types of stores than I do) that I agree with.  If your child is screaming and acting out, the thing to do is not give them the toy or candy they want.  This is positive reinforcement for a negative behavior.  All this tells the child is that if they act out, they get what they want whether or not they deserve it.
I also wonder why parents give their young children (under 5, including infants) soda and candy.  This is bad for their teeth and may upset their stomach.  I observed a set of parents giving their infant daughter MOUNTAIN DEW.  Last I knew, that much sugar and carbonation could be bad for infants.  Is this information incorrect?  If it is, please let me know.

Here's a disclaimer:  I don't tell my customers what to do or what I think is right.  It just makes me wonder is all.

Earliest Memories

I don't remember much of my first few years.  I know we lived in Florida (Homestead) and then moved to (West) Germany.  It's after moving to Germany that I start remembering things.  I remember the house and village we lived in.  I remember that, even then, I had two sets of friends.  This particular trend continued through high school.  I remember the places we'd go and the games we'd play.  I remember field trips to castles along the Rhine and Mosel Rivers.

I wish every kid had the chance to experience what I experienced as a child.

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

Admirations

I really admire my mother-in-law.  She's a strong and intelligence woman who doesn't let anything or anyone get in her way.  She's loving and compassionate.  If it wasn't for her, my daughter wouldn't be as awesome as she is.  My mother-in-law helped her with her walking, talking, and learning.  My daughter is so very receptive to learning and I have my mother-in-law to thank for it.

She's incredible.

Monday, September 19, 2011

My most prized possession

  • My most prized possession is tall enough to look my belly button in the "eye"
  • My most prized possession has curly, flaxen locks
  • My most prized possession sees through crystal blue orbs
  • My most prized possession has the voice of an angel
I love my daughter very much!

Saturday, September 17, 2011

Going on a trip

No, I'm not really leaving, but if I were, here's where I'd go.

I'd take a trip to Columbus, Ohio and spend time with my dad.  I'd bring Bella and Pat and The Boy (if able) with me.

I'd take a trip out to Southern California to visit friends and family.

I'd take a trip to Australia, too.  Pat and I hooked up there and we've been going strong ever since.

It's short and sweet but it's what I'd do.

Friday, September 16, 2011

They grow up so fast!

My bonus son was the same age as my daughter is now when I met him; 4 almost 5 years old.  He's now 12 and started juniper high this year.  I know it's different for me than my husband, but that awesome kid has been a part of my life for almost ten years now.

He is such an amazing kid.  I'm proud to call him my bonus son.  I extremely dislike the term "step-kid" and I heard the term "bonus kid" a few years ago.  I'be used that term ever since.  He's truly a bonus in my life.

Over and Over Again, I love you

I wrote this poem for my husband not long after we were married in 2005.


So many ways to say I love you
Sometimes all it takes is a kiss
A hug or a squeeze
Sometimes a smile or a laugh

So many ways to show how much you mean to me
Dedicating a song on the radio
Finding something you've always wanted
A smiling face when you come home

There is no song
No card
To show show you, to tell you
How much I love you

You are my world
You are everything to me
As the days go by,
I find that I love you more

To make love to you
Is the most beautiful way
For me to show you
All that I feel for you

My days feel empty when you're not around
I feel lonely, but I know I'm not alone
You're always with me
And that comforts me

As we grow old together,
My love for you will never falter
If I lost you, I'd lose myself
I would lose my soul

You are my being
You are the reason I am here
You are my soulmate
Mo Anam Cara

I love you,
My best friend
My lover
My husband

We will be together always
Nothing will break us apart
My love for you is too strongAnd it always will be

I look foward to spendng the rest of my life with you
Watching the world go by
Together forever
There's nothing else I would rather do

Than to be with you for all time.

A Love Letter

It would feel wrong to write this for anyone other than my husband.

Dear Patrick,
I never would have guessed that in eight years time, I'd be happily married to the PH I asked a "dumb question" to.  I knew we'd be friends for a long time; that deployment proved it.  What it also proved was that you were (and still are) the one for me.

I love that you can make me laugh, even when I want to be a bad mood.  Everyone may think you're a comedian, I know you are and you're my comedian.  You can always make a bad day a good day.

I love that when I talk, you listen and vice versa.  Before we started dating, I had big problems with communication in relationships.  You showed me that communication is key in any relationship.  I think that's one thing that has kept us together so far.  We talk to each other instead of at each other, which so many other couples tend to do.

I love how you stay in touch with The Boy.  I love the relationship you two have.  I can't wait to see the two of you together again.

I love how you interact with our Curly Top.  She loves her Daddy so much and is sad when you're not home. She's so much your daughter.

I love your hugs.  I need your hugs.
I love your soft, passion-filled kisses.
I love the way you love.
I love how your eyes change color.  My favorite is green; they look so good when they're green.
I love you so much.  Sometimes it's hard to put it all into words.

I love you, forever and always.

Thursday, September 15, 2011

My favorite poem

I have many favorite poems.  My favorite poet is Maya Angelou.  I love Phenomenal Woman and Still I Rise.  There's no way I could take her work and make it into something of my own.  While imitation is the best form of flattery, I don't know if she would appreciate me taking her work and twisting it around into something of mine.  Instead, I'll post those two poems here.


Phenomenal Woman

BY MAYA ANGELOU
Pretty women wonder where my secret lies.
I’m not cute or built to suit a fashion model’s size   
But when I start to tell them,
They think I’m telling lies.
I say,
It’s in the reach of my arms,
The span of my hips,   
The stride of my step,   
The curl of my lips.   
I’m a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,   
That’s me.

I walk into a room
Just as cool as you please,   
And to a man,
The fellows stand or
Fall down on their knees.   
Then they swarm around me,
A hive of honey bees.   
I say,
It’s the fire in my eyes,   
And the flash of my teeth,   
The swing in my waist,   
And the joy in my feet.   
I’m a woman
Phenomenally.

Phenomenal woman,
That’s me.

Men themselves have wondered   
What they see in me.
They try so much
But they can’t touch
My inner mystery.
When I try to show them,   
They say they still can’t see.   
I say,
It’s in the arch of my back,   
The sun of my smile,
The ride of my breasts,
The grace of my style.
I’m a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That’s me.

Now you understand
Just why my head’s not bowed.   
I don’t shout or jump about
Or have to talk real loud.   
When you see me passing,
It ought to make you proud.
I say,
It’s in the click of my heels,   
The bend of my hair,   
the palm of my hand,   
The need for my care.   
’Cause I’m a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That’s me.

Still I Rise

BY MAYA ANGELOU
You may write me down in history   
With your bitter, twisted lies,
You may trod me in the very dirt   
But still, like dust, I'll rise.

Does my sassiness upset you?
Why are you beset with gloom?   
’Cause I walk like I've got oil wells   
Pumping in my living room.

Just like moons and like suns,   
With the certainty of tides,   
Just like hopes springing high,   
Still I'll rise.

Did you want to see me broken?   
Bowed head and lowered eyes?   
Shoulders falling down like teardrops,   
Weakened by my soulful cries?

Does my haughtiness offend you?   
Don't you take it awful hard
’Cause I laugh like I've got gold mines   
Diggin’ in my own backyard.

You may shoot me with your words,   
You may cut me with your eyes,
You may kill me with your hatefulness,
But still, like air, I’ll rise.

Does my sexiness upset you?
Does it come as a surprise
That I dance like I've got diamonds   
At the meeting of my thighs?

Out of the huts of history’s shame
I rise
Up from a past that’s rooted in pain
I rise
I'm a black ocean, leaping and wide,   
Welling and swelling I bear in the tide.

Leaving behind nights of terror and fear
I rise
Into a daybreak that’s wondrously clear
I rise
Bringing the gifts that my ancestors gave,   
I am the dream and the hope of the slave.   
I rise
I rise   
I rise.

Wednesday, September 14, 2011

Applying for my dream job

Y'know, I've written things like this more times than I can count.  Why?  Every single job I've ever applied for had a section like this.  This is one entry that will be very, very short.

I don't like writing about myself, especially when it comes to trying to talk myself up to potential employers.  Buzz words don't work as well as they want you to think.

Just be yourself, yet professional.  If you can find that happy medium between being just you and being professional, you've got the cat in the bag.

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

My First Love...

My first love was Ryan James McCarthy.  We met in the 8th grade and really hit it off.  He was quite a bit shorter than me, so it made things a little awkward.  Then again, 8th grade was awkward.  We met through a mutual friend, Mike Falkner, and it was the three of us all the time.  Just me and the boys.

I don't know when we realized it, but we hooked up before Valentine's Day.  We were together off and on from 8th grade thru 10th grade (the year he moved away).  I pined for him, but my interests were also on a guy a grade below me (but a year older than me and TALLER).  Pete Coleman and I were really good friends.  In fact, we still talk.

I met up with my first love again after I graduated high school.  I was living with my best friend, Tanya Collins, in Ventura, California and Ryan was going to the University of Idaho in Moscow, Idaho.  He paid for a bus ticket for me to visit him for eight days around his birthday and Halloween.  It was the best eight days of my life at that point.  I was barely 18 years old (he'd just turned 18 a week before Halloween) and we'd lost our virginity to each other.  It was sweet, really.  We were both so awkward again.

Now, I'm 30 years old; he's still 29.  He's married to the girl he moved onto after me (this whole process was long for me and nerve wracking; this was when I started smoking a lot and cutting) and they have two beautiful little girls.  Their oldest daughter is about ten days or so younger than my Belladonna.

I think from time to time how things could have changed, how they could have been different.  Sometimes, I wonder this with the other main interest in my life before meeting my husband.  The one I could have had, but never got the chance.  I remember telling Pete's girlfriend at a New Year's party that I still really liked him and still wanted him for me.  He told me years later that he thought it was cool.  I mean, me telling his current girlfriend that I had feelings for him to her face.

I play the "what if" game.  Where would I be if Ryan and I actually stuck it out?  I learned later that you NEVER marry your first; you spend the rest of your life wondering what it would be like with someone else.  Where would I be if Pete and I actually hooked up my senior year?  What if condoms broke with other boyfriends?  It's truly a miracle that I don't have any STDs.  Not everyone I slept with was protected.

In any case, I'm happy where I am.  I am happy with my husband, Patrick, my daughter, Belladonna.  I'm happy to have the extended family on his side.

I guess that's it for this entry.  I may find another older entry from many years ago on a different online journal website that details it more.  If anyone wants to know, really, how things were going when Ryan finally ended things with me and what it did to my psyche, I'll search for those lost entries and post them here.  Just leave a comment.  Thanks for reading!

Monday, September 12, 2011

How do you do that?

Some have asked what my writing style is like.  As far as blogs go, I typically write the same way I talk, with varying use of words depending on who I'm speaking with.  My speech tends to acclimate to the speech patterns of whoever I'm talking to.

When it comes to my story writing, I get a little from here, a little from there.  Often, my writing style is similar to whichever author I'm reading at the time.  The story I've been working on for the last several years started out as my own writing style.  I started reading the Dark Hunter series by Sherrilyn Kenyon and my story became a work of romance instead of fiction.  I read two trilogies from Nora Roberts, which only fueled the writing style.  Last summer, I started reading a series by Yasmine Galenorn.

I composed poetry when I was younger; I haven't written much of it in recent years.  I think I was still deployed when I wrote my last poem.  I think I need to write one for Belladonna for each of her birthdays and give them to her when she turns 18.  If I can find them, I'll have to try finding a photo of her from each year to affix to the page.

Now, if I'm trying to write something for a specific purpose, like a research paper, I use proper punctuation, grammar, spelling, all that jazz as well as using MLA format.

September 11, 2001 -- A wake-up call

We all know what happened.  It was a huge wake-up call.  I have somewhat controversial views on this.

Yes, it sucks that it happened, but it brought Americans together again.  You see so many countries out there who are so proud of their people.  All the time.  It makes me sad that it has to take some pretty drastic measures for us to be proud.  Yeah, you see a lot of people wearing red, white, and blue in support and love for the good ol' United States, but those people are either veterans (like myself) or are from certain parts of the country.  I've been all over the continental United States and I've seen that those who live in the South are the most patriotic; it doesn't have to take a tragedy for them to feel kinship with one another.

It bothers me that for the rest of the United States, something absolutely terrible had to happen.

I'm proud to have served my country.  It's terrible that the World Trade Center was destroyed.  It was a wake-up call that needed to be made.

Any work of art, huh?

If I could jump into any work of art, it would be.. I'm not really sure.  I've actually been thinking about this question since the tenth and I really can't think of one that I like enough.  There are plenty of artists I like (Monet, Da Vinci, Dali), but none of their work really jumps out at me.  I guess I'll have to think about it more.

Saturday, September 10, 2011

Blarg

I'm still not feeling very well today.  I had a relatively short shift at work-- five and a half hours.  I have a full shirt tomorrow, but I honestly don't know if I'll be able to go all day.  It sucks that I can't earn sick days until after I've been there for a year.

Seriously, who does that?

Friday, September 09, 2011

A few small changes

I made a few small changes to my blog.  Nothing new to the layout, but I changed the font and background image.  I think it fits a bit better than what I had before.  I may change the image to something different, but, for now it works.

Happy Birthday, Mom!

Today is my mom's birthday.  I was so wrapped up in my head (almost literally, with the head cold I've got) that I *almost* forgot.  I didn't want to strain or hurt my voice by calling her, so I left a birthday message on her Facebook wall.

At my happiest

I suppose one of my happiest times would be when I graduated high school.  I was excited to be done with it and really looked forward to where my life was going to go.

Another happy time for me was when I realized who I was going to spend the rest of my life with.  I'd made a best friend on my ship and it turned out that we both had feelings for each other.

A happy time after that would have been the night my daughter was born.  Holding her for the first time was incredible and I wouldn't trade that feeling for all of the money in the world.

Thursday, September 08, 2011

To journal while travelling

I don't think I have.  If I have, it's in a journal or diary that I had a long time ago.  I haven't had an actual vacation where I'm spending money on stuff since I was 17 or 18 years old and I was on my senior trip with my friend and her family.  We were in Orlando at a timeshare for about a week.  By the time the week was over, I looked as red as a lobster!  I could move very well for a few days and pretty much wore my swim suit for a week.  It sucked.  A LOT.

A late-summer story

How about the one where I thought I was getting an allergy attack and it turned into an end-of-summer head cold?  I had to pretty much cancel my plans of going to class today.  I emailed both teachers and heard back from one of them.  I have to work a full day tomorrow and I can NOT miss it.  I had time-and-a-half for working Monday so to make it worth it, I HAVE to work tomorrow.  At least I don't have class again until Tuesday.

Tuesday, September 06, 2011

It's going to be a long day tomorrow

So, tomorrow I have a full work day from 9am - 5pm.  I also have a government class from 6pm-9pm, so I'll pretty much be gone from the house for 12+ hours.  I'll be home for my lunch hour, since it only takes me 10 minutes one-way.

I'm still recovering from the last four workdays.  I've had four full eight hour days and standing in one spot, hardly able to move more than maybe two square feet at a time.  Sometimes, I can get out of my register cubicle to scan stuff in a cart, but that doesn't always happen.

I'll be able to eat lunch at home (I think I'm going to skip the mayo and mustard on my sandwich to cut down on the bad calories and whatnot).  I'm going to see if I can stop by Taco Bell or something on my way to class tomorrow evening.

I'll be happy when tomorrow is over because then it'll be another day off from work.  This entire week is a nearly 40 hour work week, something I'm not used to with this particular job.  If I can get more weeks like this, it won't be any problem at all.

Back to school

For me, it's always been in school, not back to school. 

I still have a year before my baby girl starts school.  I think I'm going to get her school list items together before she even starts school in order to avoid the rush at the end of next summer.

Monday, September 05, 2011

Labor of Love

It actually takes a bit for me to write or blog or journal. Many times, I need inspiration to write anymore. If there is a daily prompt to write about, I'll write.

I'm trying to get in the habit if writing every single day.  Sometimes it's hard.  Life tends to get in the way.

Just a friendly reminder

Don't rush your cashier.  They will only move slower.  If you have sale items, they won't give them to you. 

That is all.

Saturday, September 03, 2011

Chromaggia

These lyrics are in Italian, one of the most beautiful languages out there.  When you read the English translation, it's quite sad.

Tanto tempo fa,
Un uccello fatale di nome,
Chromaggia,
Incrociò in volo la freccia di un,
Arciere,
Lungo le coste di lava,
Per anni, pensando di essere,
Inseguita,
Scappò dalla freccia,
[ Lyrics from: http://www.lyricsmode.com/lyrics/s/sarah_brightman/chromaggia.html ]
Chromaggia, Chromaggia,
Perché non affronti il pericolo?
La freccia era legata all'ala,
E lei volva per liberarsene,

Tirando la freccia,
Altri son ferriti per mia colpa,
Mia colpa,

Giú! Verso la bocca del diavolo!
La sua freccia, I miei occhi.

Chromaggia, come take these eyes... !
I would rather be blind!
A long time ago,
A fatal bird named
Chromaggia
met the arrow of an archer
while flying
Along the lava coasts
for years, thinking she was being chased
She escaped the arrow

Chromaggia, Chromaggia
Why not face the danger?
The arrow was attached to her wing
And she wanted to be free.

Dragging the arrow,
Others get hurt and its my fault
My fault.

Down! Towards the mouth of the devil
Her arrow, in my eyes.

Friday, September 02, 2011

Memories from this summer

Most of the memories I have from this past summer include a lot of work and a lot of school.  I didn't get a chance to spend a lot of time with my family.  I think I spent more time at both work and school than I did with my family this summer.  I just keep telling myself that when school is done, I'll have an Associate's degree in something that will help me get a better job than the cashier job I have now.

I went to the lake with a couple of friends of mine earlier in the summer before it got really, really hot.  Bella loved it and and made some new friends.  As it happens, one of those new friends lives less than a minute away!  We haven't been over there, though.  I work with her daddy and bonus mom.  Hopefully we'll be able to hang out more often.

While this next bit has nothing to do with today's title, I think that if I really like the math instructor I have, I might take an additional math class or two to complete my Associate's in Business Administration.  I think I need Finite Mathematics and Statistics, so we'll see how that goes.

I also need to take a Spanish class.  I think I'm going to take a full load in the Spring semester (five classes) to try and finish up as much as I can toward my Associate's in Business Administration.  I think that with all that classes I've taken (and will take during winter break and intersession next year), I'll have enough for SOMETHING besides General Studies.

I've also been going back to my Milady book.  When I have the funds for it, I'm going to register online to take practice tests and save the money I need to take the REAL written exam.  After I take the written exam, I can do the practical exam and then I'm done!  I think I'm going to drive to Shreveport instead of Dallas.  I need to make sure that it won't count as a Louisiana cosmetology license, though.  I also need to replenish what I need for my practical exam and find someone to go with me to Shreveport when I take my practical exam.  I'm sure if I post something on Facebook around that time, I won't have a problem finding someone.

Thursday, September 01, 2011

My writing career...

I was 12 years old when I received my very first diary.  It was white with pink ballet slippers on it and there was a lock and key for it.  I tried to write in it every single day, but found that my life wasn't really that interesting.  When that year was up, I still managed to get a new diary or journal for the next year.

After high school (and six years of writing in a journal), I found out about online journals.  I had one on DeadJournal.com, Diaryland, and one more.  Later, I found Blogspot.  I liked the interface much better.  MySpace and CafeMom came along and both had journal sections of their pages.  Thus, I tried the journal online a bit more.

I don't have too many journal or blogging influences.  I write when I want to write or when I have something to write about.  It's not the typical "I did this today..." anymore.  Thanks to social networking sites, like Facebook, I don't write those anymore.