Posts

Showing posts from 2011

Ringing in the new year

I'm pretty sure I work that day.  We may try to watch the ball drop on television, but when my mother-in-law tried that last year, the local channel switched to something the locals were doing instead.  It's very possible they'll do the same thing this year.  Not much else, really.  We've never been big on ringing in the new year.

Snow.. I hate the stuff

Snow is pretty to look at, sure.  After driving and walking in it, slipping and sliding through it, not to mention shoveling it.. well, you find that you are disillusioned about it.  It's just pretty to look at but honestly you don't want to be anywhere near it. I've spent most of my life living in places (won't say states as I've lived overseas) where there is snow nearly every single year (and not always during the winter!).  I was stationed in San Diego, California for several years with my husband, and I quickly became accustomed to "snow-free" winters.  It rained for the winter season and I'm cool with that; just no "fluffy" white stuff. We re-located to Denver (where I left for boot camp) and stayed with my mother for a couple of years.  The first year we were there, the snow wasn't too bad.  The second year was terrible; blizzards.  After that winter, we decided we were going to leave Colorado and leave the snow behind. We mo

Favorite Childhood Toys..

I had one of those cars that you push down on, pull back, and let go.  It was red and I loved it.  I played with Barbies from time to time, but my sister played with them more than I did.  Thinking back, I used my imagination a lot more.  My favorite pretend game was TMNT.  There were always dirt piles (for construction) near to where I lived and we ALWAYS played there.  Those were some really fun times; sometimes I wish I was a kid again.

Santa..

I believed in Santa until I was about 10 years old.  My sister and I received roller skates for Christmas one year.  I was snooping in my parents room and found the boxes for them as well as leftover wrapping paper the next morning.  I doubt Santa would wrap the gifts when he got there and so my belief was gone.

Family holiday traditions

 When it was just living with my family growing up, we would open one gift on Christmas Eve (this gift was ALWAYS pajamas) and then everything else the next morning.  My sister always played "elf" with my mother; I always liked getting surprised the next morning. Now that it's me, my husband, daughter, and bonus son, we have several more traditions.  We're keeping the one gift on the Eve (both Solstice and Christmas) and one of those gifts will always be pajamas.  On the morning of Solstice/Yule, we and the kids open 2-3 gifts.  On Christmas morning, everything else is opened.  A tradition that my husband's family has is tree presents.  Just a few small, wrapped gifts that are hidden inside the tree's branches.   The stocking tradition with my family was fun, I think.  We always had two red apples and two oranges in the "foot" portion of the stocking.  The rest was filled with practical items (new toothbrush, toothpaste, deodorant, etc.) but i

Holiday baking

I started a new tradition with my daughter this year.  Each holiday, I make a pumpkin cheesecake and she helps me make it.  She pours in most of the ingredients and mixes them up (after I do a run-through first).  She loves helping in general and gets a really big kick out of helping with the cooking and baking.  Any time I see a picture of baked holiday goods, it brings to mind her helping me.

Winter Memories?

This memory really isn't all that happy, but the memory that I think of most from childhood was Christmas 1989.  We were stationed (Air Force) in western Germany and we flew to the U.S. for the holidays with my mother's family.  Long story short, my mother wound up between two parked cars (she was getting baggage from the trunk of a car we rented) and her sister "hit" her with the car she was in front of.  CAR-MOM-OTHER CAR.  "CAR" was our rental and "OTHER CAR" was the car her sister was in.  "OC" was a manual transmission and her oldest sister leaves it in gear.  Her middle sister (Mom is the youngest of three) never does.  Her middle sister turned on the "OC" and it lurched forward.  Both bumpers hit both knees and the license plate hit her left knee. She required 3 screws to keep the knee in place and has had arthritis ever since.  It's not a super happy memory but it's the most memorable one.

Contemporary Yule/Solstice Traditions

While we may not go all out for Yule and Solstice each year, we open gifts and celebrate on the Winter Solstice.  I've researched a little bit on the contemporary traditions. Neopaganism As forms of  Neopaganism  can be quite different and have very different origins, these representations can vary considerably despite the shared name. Some celebrate in a way as close as possible to how they believe Ancient Germanic pagans observed the tradition, while others observe the holiday with rituals culled from numerous other unrelated sources including Germanic. In Germanic Neopagan sects,  Yule  is celebrated with gatherings that often involve a meal and gift giving. Further attempts at reconstruction of surviving accounts of historical celebrations are often made, a hallmark being variations of the traditional. Groups such as the  Asatru Folk Assembly  in the US recognize the celebration as lasting 12 days, beginning on the date of the  winter solstice . In most forms of  Wicc

Finals are done!!

I took my last final for the semester.  It's not one of my favorite classes nor is it one of my better classes.  I feel like it's going to be a C test, but I'm hoping for a C for the entire class. I managed a B for my online class, Cultural Anthropology.  This grade is much better than I originally expected. Yesterday, I took my finals for College Algebra and Physics.  I think I'm going to manage a B out of my math class and possibly a C (a B if I'm lucky) out of my science class. Next Monday starts a mini-mester and only goes until January 3rd.  I'm taking Business English, but I have a feeling that it's going to be cancelled due to lack of enrollment.  There aren't many classes offered during the mini-mester. Hopefully, things will work out.

Holiday To-Do list?

I don't have much planned between now and the end of the month.  I've already finished the gift shopping and nearly everything is wrapped.  The tree goes up next week.  I have a final tomorrow and then a mini-mester class starting next Monday (providing it's not cancelled due to lack of enrollment).  I've also got work.  I need to talk to personnel about my schedule, though.  I submitted a change in availability a couple of weeks ago and it didn't take.  I get to talk to someone about that tomorrow.

Some prompts for later...

Is there something you said you'd never do, but did it anyway?  What happened? Do you mediate?  Does it help to relax you? What does the holiday spirit mean to you? Is there a toy you couldn't live without when you were a kid?

The perfect gift.

So, this will sound a bit cheesy, but, spending the day with my family, ALL of my family, watching movies together.  Not exactly something tangible, but, it's something I'd really like to have.  This day will come soon, I'm sure of it.

A nice warm bath

Recently I took a bath to help alleviate some back pain I'd been having.  I poured in some epsom salts and basked in the hot water.  We have a garden tub, but it's not big enough.  It's really only big enough for Bella to play around in.  The hot water gets cold too fast, so it's almost like a rushed quiet time. The only time I take a bath is if something hurts or I need to relax.  It will be a wonderful bath when the water stays hot, the suds stay high, and the water can actually cover me, laying down, from the neck down.

Christmas Lights!

When I was a kid, we used to drive around the different neighborhoods in our area and look at all the amazing lights.  We never did it ourselves; we couldn't deal with the higher electric bill.  It was nice to enjoy the work and effort of others. The local park would put up lights every year and have a parade of sorts.  It seemed really magical.  I'm sure it would now, but for other reasons. There's a zoo near the last city I lived in that had Zoo Lights.  We took the kids to it in 2008 and we all had a GREAT time.  I think my sister and nephew were there, too, enjoying it with us.  That memory, all of us together, is my favorite.

Silence is Golden but duct tape is silver...

Sometimes silence can be too much, especially if I'm working on something.  Lately, I've had a Sirius XM radio station playing (Lithium) in the background while working on papers for school.  Today, though, seems like a good day for the Science channel.  Mike Rowe is narrating a show about How the Universe Works.

Playing Hooky

Actually, I'm not playing hooky today.  I worked for a few hours before coming home.  I was going to see if I could work a little later (until I had to go to class tonight) but I wasn't feeling it, so I left when I was supposed to.  If I were to play hooky all day, it would be spent on Facebook, CafeMom, Twitter, and playing Shaiya. I love Words with Friends on Facebook.  It's a terrible addiction.  I keep my skills up once a week by playing Scrabble with my hubby and mother-in-law. I have a favorite group or two on CafeMom, one of them being the Journals group.  I used to frequent the Journals section way back when CafeMom first started, but the quality of those journals started going downhill.  Really dumb (in my opinion) journals were getting votes from other moms to be in the top ten journals.  Journals like, "I woke up and made some coffee and now I'm going to veg all day," were hitting #1 on a regular basis.  I met a lot of my CM friends through the

I feel like dancing!!

Image
I remember the first dance I did.  When I was younger and in a lower grade of elementary school, I had a jazz dance class after school at the AYA (don't ask me now what it stands for, but it was a center for kids to go to after school while their active duty parents were still at work on the base).  We were part of a huge recital.  One of our two numbers was to Michael Jackson's Thriller and the other one was something to do with a boardwalk (I don't think it was Bette Midler's Under the Boardwalk).  I remember having a great time. The next dance I remember doing and having a wonderful time was the first dance with my husband as a married couple.  Nearly every married woman remembers that!  I love slow-dancing and he said that he's not much of a dancer ("Let me lead.").  He said that he was embarrassed about dancing in front of all of the people there.  I told him to just pretend that no one was there and that it was just us.  I'm not sure that worke

Personal Goals, huh?

Aside from having an incredible family, I'm finally conquering college algebra.  My next, and final, math to conquer will be business calculus (I'm going for a business admin degree).  From there, I have two accounting classes, which should be fine. When I'm all done with school, I should have an Associate's in business admin AND criminal justice, thus expanding the fields I can work in.

When life hands you lemons...

... hand the lemons back and demand to see life's manager.

A perfect night on the town

I'll tell you what, it's nothing like Date Night, lol! Dinner, movies, and a night's stay at the Candlewood Suites in town.  There, we can play DDO or Shaiya without worrying about using up all of our bandwith.  We're RPG geeks.  =D

Life as a television show??

It'd be pretty boring, actually, and not worth watching.

Turkey Day!

I work on Turkey Day but I'll be home after 3pm.  We have a small turkey since it will only be the four of us this year.  We're going to have stuffing, cranberry sauce, deviled eggs, mashed potatoes, pumpkin pie, Dutch apple pie, pumpkin cheesecake, and probably a few more things. I actually try to work Turkey Day if I can.  With the retail jobs I've had in the past, employees have been compensated for their wages for working Turkey Day and any other federal holiday.  Working the day before, the day of, and the day after means that I'm getting the holiday compensation pay. My work day will start at 7am, which means I'm getting up at 5:30am to get ready and leave by 6:30.  I'll probably take some coffee with me as well as my water.  I'm going to need something to keep me awake tomorrow.

Tweet of the Day, sort of

@AshleeTheShow: The best thing in life is finding someone who knows all your flaws, mistakes, & weaknesses, & still thinks you're completely amazing. Shared via TweetCaster

Favorite Childhood Memory

I'm not sure what to put here, actually.  I had a good childhood, but I can think of anything to put here.

A Victory...

I'd put out there that I was able to overcome my anxiety, but that's wrong.  I really didn't.  Every time I think about it, it gets worse. I've had terrible anxiety about losing Bella.  I know that every parent, typically, feels this way about their kids.  This anxiety stops me in my tracks and keeps me home with her on my days off from work.  I can't let her out of my sight.  If she's gone for even a split-second when we're out, I freak out.  My heart goes a thousand miles a minute.  I panic. I also have a terrible crowd anxiety.  This one has been within the last ten years.  I keep hoping that I'll get over it, but I can't.

Alice?

This is like a continuation of the classic story of Alice and Wonderland.  It's been a few generations since the original Alice.  Instead of the Victorian Age, it's the Modern Age.. present-day, if you will. "Alice?  Alice, are you listening?" The girl awoke from her nightmare of nonsense and looked at her mother. "Hmmm?  I drifted off to sleep again." "Again?  Aren't you getting enough sleep at night?" "No, not really.  I keep getting these nightmares.  I haven't had them in years, it seems.  I'm not sure what's going on to bring them back." "Maybe we should go to the doctor," said her mother. "I'm up for anything at this point," replied Alice. They made the appointment with a psychiatrist, Dr. Conrad, for that afternoon.  After a few moments of speaking with Alice and her mother, Dr. Conrad decided to try some hypnotherapy. "All right, Alice.  Just listen to my voice and rel

The role I play

I think I wear a few hats as opposed to just one.  I care for my daughter when I'm home.  I teach her the good values that we have.  I nurture and love all the time.  I don't often take risks, though.  I associate risks with gambling and I don't gamble. More often than anything else, I'm always a tired one.

Secrets

I don't think I'll share secrets, but I'll share a link about secrets. Post Secret

I can't believe five years went by so fast

Image
Five years ago today, my world changed. My mother and sister were in town (we were stationed in San Diego, CA at the time).  My sister, husband, and I were all active duty Navy and my mother drove into town from Denver, CO.  I was nine months pregnant and eight days overdue.  My mother got into town late morning on that Saturday.  We had pizza and then Mom went to the Navy Lodge for a bit. At roughly 5:30 that evening, my water broke.  After gathering my hospital stuff and trying to calm down (as well as keep track of the contractions), we hopped in my car (my husband, myself, and my mother-in-law) and drove to Naval Medical Center San Diego. Once we arrived, the doctors had me pee on a stick to make sure that it was my water that had broken and then they checked to see how dialated I was.  As it turns out, my baby had turned a 180 and was now breech.  I didn't want the doctors to risk hurting her so I told them I wanted a Cesarean.  "Are you sure?" they asked me.  

Fears

Whenever I'm faced with something I fear, I panic.  The "fight or flight" instinct kicks in and it usually goes with "flight."  This is just with me.  If it has anything to do with my kids, you bet your ass I'm choosing "fight."  Whether the child involved is my biological daughter or my bonus son, the "fight" instinct comes into play. You don't mess with my kids.  This is definitely something that every parent can attest to.

Me Time

I get "me time" every now and again.  I usually spend it online, watching tv, or just hanging out in our bedroom.  It's not much, but I like it. At the moment, Bella and I are watching Jem on Hub.

Parenting Styles

I was raised by my mom and step-dad.  My step-dad was deployed quite a bit when my sister and I were young, so it was mostly our mom raising us. My parenting style differs quite a bit from my mother's parenting style.  I try not to censor my daughter (neither did my mom with my sister and me, but there were still a few things that we were censored from, I think).  We let our daughter watch pretty much whatever she wants to watch.  There are scenes from some movies that I will not let her watch or even listen to.  Any sexual scenes in movies I either divert her attention or we both leave the room. When I was younger, I remember my mother being at home with my sister and me a lot.  She was active duty Air Force (I think), but she was able to divert time for us.  I'm not able to do that right now, what with working and going to school, but I do what I can.  I know my husband does, too. She let us listen to the music that she enjoyed listening to.  We do the same thing with o

What others see in me

When I'm at work, I receive one of three compliments:  "Your [eye] make-up looks incredible!"  "I love your hair color [currently red]; it looks great with your complexion."  "I wish my complexion was as clear as yours!"  Each of these statements make me blush. There is one element that makes my eye make-up stand out-- glitter.  I *love* to wear glitter.  I wear it on and around my eyes when I go to work.  When I get ready for only class, I leave the glitter at home.  I have found that my "regulars" come in to see what I've done next with my make-up.  The glitter is only the icing; the cake is a combination of the colors that I use and how I blend them.  In fact, earlier today, a older woman ("mature" if you will) asked me if I was doing something special after work since I was wearing all that glitter.  I told her, "No, Ma'am, I always do this with my make-up."  "That's very unusual," was her only

Hidden Aspects of Me

On the outside, it seems as though words don't hurt me, but they really do.  I try to be strong for others, even when I'm not doing well myself. When I was in boot camp, I'd already been away from home for some months before.  For a lot of the kids there, it was their first time away from home.  I was strong for them, but several weeks in, I wept.  Looking back on it, I really didn't want to, but I did to show the others that I was also weak.  We stuck together for 9.2 weeks.

Hidden Path

Slowly falling, trees swaying Picture frames are hanging closely Far from the edge Of my consciousness The path is laid out in front of me Memories of times long gone Pierce my soul, my body taking the damage Years come and go, flying by It seems so far away now I wish I could have stopped it

Dear Customer--

Hi, it's your cashier.  Can you do me a super huge favor?  Get off of your cell phone when you come through  my line.  I can't do my job properly if you're busy talking about the latest drama with your sister's best friend's cousin who... y'know?  Also, please don't give me bogus sale ad prices; I have ALL the ads right there at my register and I will call you on your bullshit.  Don't waste your breath.  Do you like having your items bagged randomly?  I don't like TO bag them randomly, but it's difficult to maintain some kind of order if you don't put your items on the belt the way you'd like it bagged.  All I'm going to do is move your items along the belt until I have some like/similar items together.  You may think me doing that wastes your time, but you may end up wasting time at home when you put your groceries away and then bitch about why the cashier didn't bag properly. Stop giving into your child in the checkout line.  

Happy Veteran's Day

Image
Thank you to the past, present, and future service members for your continued service. My husband and I were active duty Navy for 4 and 6 years, respectively.  It's where we met and will always hold a special place in my heart. Here are some of our photos.  My mother posted a bunch of them on Facebook. #1 is with an ABH I became friends with.. and I'm still friends with her.  This was August 2003 onboard USS Peleliu (LHA 5).  We deployed for seven (supposed to be nine) months later that month.  #2 was my cruise book photo.  What you don't see is that I was only wearing the top for our dress blues uniform.  Photo #3 is of me and my boot camp buddy, Danica, on the day we deployed.  #4 is my mom and me.  Photo #5 is still me and my boot camp buddy, Danica; we're somewhere in that picture, standing next to each other.  Photo #6 was taken May 23, 2007-- my 26th birthday.  Bella six months old and Patrick deployed for five months. Five months may not seem like a long ti

What I want others to know about my faith...

My faith boils down to Nature-- loving and appreciating Nature and respecting Her.  I;n polytheistic and draw from the deities of other cultures, like Norse, Indian, Native American, Greek, Egyptian, et al.  Two of my favorite Goddesses are Egyptian and Indian-- Isis and Lakshmi.  Another favorite is Kuan Yin (Korean). I use stones and herbs, as well as Tarot cards for divining.  I can be found on a phpbb forum for pagans, where I moderate two forums-- Beginner's Advice and The Crystal Ballroom. I've been a pagan for over ten years now and I've never felt better.

Five Qualities

What do I want to leave behind?  How about leaving people to remember five awesome qualities of mine.  This will require some thought, mind you, but I think I can do this. Okay, so this is harder than I thought it was going to be.  I think I ... I may have to come back to this.  I can't think of anything that would be worth remembering.  I bet my husband and friends are better about this.

Here's what gets me really irritated...

When customers at work pretend like they don't know how to speak English and just point at things.  I'm so tempted to tell them the same thing I tell my daughter, "Use your words!" I actually wrote an ENTIRE post about customers in general last month, but I caught a lot of flack for it when I posted it in the original avenue.

Yes, I work

I work for a large retailer as a cashier.  We're just now getting into an even busier season-- The Holidays.  People are getting ready for Turkey Day and their gift giving day in December.  People upset me on a regular basis.. mostly customers.  I can easily start out a shift in a fantastic mood, but one customer (or FIVE) can come through my line and ruin it for the rest of the day. Shorter, four to five and a half hour shifts are worse than the full eight hour shift.  With the latter, I have two breaks plus an hour lunch.  With the shorter shifts, there's only one break.  Time goes by much slower. I work for a few reasons.  One, I have to.  Two, if I didn't, I'd go stir-crazy.  Three, I feel better when I'm able to earn a living.

If I could teach my kids one thing about life...

That one thing would be that life is unfair, no matter how you look at it.  They also need to know that life is what you make of it.

Human Connection

The human connection is kind of funny, I think.  There's the biological connection that we all have and that connection changed and mutated through the millenia as people migrated around the land masses of the world.  If you trace us all back, further than just a few hundred years on Ancestry, you'll find that we pretty began life in Africa.  At least, that's what my anthropology book states. There's also the digital connection these days.  A large number of the world's population use a desktop or laptop computer.  There are tons of social networking sites where we can find friends, old and new.  This is just a recent change in our connection with one another.

Dear Me,

I think you are an amazing woman.  You've done an incredible amount of things in your 30 years; make the next 30 years just as incredible, if not more.  I know you can do it.

Anything?

If I could change anything, it would be my metabolism.  If it were higher, I'd be able to keep weight off much easier than what I'm doing now.

I just figured out something awesome

So, I went to my college's website to check out the catalog for 2010-2011 to see which classes I needed for two different Associate's degrees.  I've already taken most of my core classes; I'm actually finishing up the last three of those this semester (College Algebra, Physical Science [Physics], and State & Local Government). I need six more classes to complete an Associate's degree in Business Administration.  The necessary classes are Principles of Accounting I & II, Business Calculus (just the word "calculus" scares me), Principles of Microeconomics, Principles of Macroeconomics, and Business Law.  The last class flows right into the second Associate's degree I want. I need five more classes for an Associate's in Criminal Justice.  Those necessary classes include:  Fundamentals of Criminal Law, Texas Peace Officer Law, Texas Peace Officer Procedures, Texas Peace Officer Skills, Criminal Investigation, and Legal Aspects of Law Enforc

Three Accomplishments

My biggest accomplishment is my daughter. My next greatest accomplishment is my bonus son. My third best accomplishment is meeting my soulmate (thank you, US Navy!).

Frustration!

The scent of my frustration is a pile of dung that I can't get rid of.  It invades my nose and I can't get rid of it, thus I get frustrated.  Frustration is the smell of "fresh cotton," for the same reason as dung.  Pretty much any scent I dislike it frustration.

It never fails...

Image
The evening was still crisp.  I stood alone under a maple tree; I could feel the leaves crunching beneath my feet.  The wind was cold yet cleansing.  I stood and stared at her tombstone, unsure what to think.  There were so many things I wanted to say, but those words escaped me. I was lost.  I didn't know where to go.  I was all alone.    

Age is but a number

I remember when I was in high school, I remembering hearing about ladies counting their age backwards once they reached 30 or just staying 30 for the next 30 years, then becoming 40.  Why not be proud of how old you are? I don't keep my age a secret.  Then again, I'm 30 and I look like a sophomore in college.. at most.  There are a lot of people I talk to who don't believe that I'm old enough to have an almost five year old child nor do they believe that I've served in the Navy [for four years].  I've been halfway around the world thanks to the Navy. My secret is that I act how the age I feel.  Some days, my joints make me feel like I'm in my 60s, but my general attitude and personality help to keep me "young."  I take care of my skin and I drink a lot of water.  This keeps my skin youthful and it's a habit I don't plan on dropping any time soon. My husband also does his part to keep me "young."  There are four years differe

One of Bella's best milestones

For the longest time, Bella had a hard time saying, "girl."  When she'd say it, it would sound like, "gourl."  One random evening, on our way home from an awesome dinner at IHOP, she said, "girl," correctly.  When she realized she said it the right way, she wouldn't stop saying it, lol.

Life changes after high school

I'm definitely nowhere I thought I would be when I graduated high school in 1999.  I'm actually better off than where I thought I'd be.  I thought that I would save up some money and drive up to Oregon, where one of my best friends lives.  I never made that trip.  The choices I made moved me to someplace entirely different than what I originally thought. I'm 30 years old now.  Since graduating high school, I've attempted college three or four times.  I was part of the Rocky Horror Picture Show in Denver for a time.  I joined the Navy for four years and wound up finding a great guy to spend the rest of my life with; he gave me a daughter, too, which I thought was awesome.  Not only that, but he brought with him a son.  Both kids mean an incredible deal to me. At 30 years old, I didn't know I'd be living in Texas. Honestly, I wasn't sure WHAT I was going to be doing at this point in my life.  About a third of my life has already been lived.  It seems t

Favorite Family Stuff

We look forward to Saturday night every week.  It's our board game night.  The first few weeks we started this, it was Scrabble.  I play Words with Friends on my phone and Facebook and wasn't doing too well.  In playing Scrabble with my husband and mother-in-law, I was able to better my skills. We played Trivial Pursuit 90s edition last Saturday.  One game lasted THREE HOURS!  It was awesome.  If I didn't have to get up early for work the next morning, we would have played longer.  =)

Picture Inspiration

Image
What is this picture?  I'm not sure exactly.  I think it looks like a screen shot from the music video, "Broken," by Seether featuring Amy Lee of Evanescence.

Did I always know I was going to have kids?

Not always.  When I was younger, I thought I was going to end up an old maid with a bunch of cats.  I never in a million years thought I would be married to an amazing guy, much less have a child of my own.  Once we became a couple, an engaged couple, a married couple, I knew we were going to have kids.. at least one.  Now, we have our daughter.  We also have his son, my bonus son, from a previous marriage. So, technically, I have two kids.  I couldn't have asked for a better pair of kids, either.

Experiencing Loss

It's never easy.  As we get older, our older family members and friends move on to the next phase in their life.  My great uncle passed away when I was 14 years old.  My great=great aunt passed away while I was on deployment less; less than ten years after my great uncle died (both were blood relatives, so not married to each other). In June 2004, my paternal grandmother passed away.  I took this very, very hard.  I received a call from my mother in Denver (I was living in San Diego) that morning and by that afternoon/evening, I had plane tickets to return home and then fly back east for the funeral.  I was in my dress whites and my former Marine cousin had to do my neckerchief.  I read a copy of a poem I'd written on the plane ride there and slipped it into her casket. In March 2010, her husband, my Pappy, joined her.  I took this very, very hard, as well.  I left work early that night (I was out of the Navy and working at Walgreens, living in Denver) and by the next after

#IWanttobeaWriter #MyAuthorHeros @YasmineGalenorn @LKHamilton @KathyReichs

Sure, there is.  I'd love to be able to bring in the dough so that we can be comfortable.  If I didn't have a problem writing books and stories that people want to read, I'd do that in my spare time (ha!  what's that, again?) and just write books and sell them.  I have plenty of ideas, I think, as well as resources to support what I come up with.  It would, of course, be fiction writing.  I have at least two story ideas floating around in my, seemingly, empty head.  I'm sure if I read enough other genres of books and bring in what I already know, I'd be able to put together an amazing story for others to read and earn money from the books sold. So, yeah.. I want to have the talent to write 10-15 pages of story each day and find a good publisher, distributor, and so on.  I commend the authors that I follow [on Twitter] for being able to do this.

The Death of Gadhafi

So, I turn on the laptop and go to Facebook this morning and see that cbs.com and the Coffee Party shared a link that Gadhafi is dead.  He was a tyrant in Libya since 1969 and died today.  The people of Libya are celebrating.  After looking back on what he did for the country (or rather, for himself), who can really blame them?  Below is a link from CNN.com about his death. http://news.blogs.cnn.com/2011/10/20/libyan-fighters-say-they-have-captured-gadhafi/?iref=BN1&hpt=hp_t1

Reasons to break off a wedding

Different reasons to break off a wedding include: It's just not working out The bride/groom slept with the best man/maid of honor or someone Turns out that one of them prefers the same/different gender I've never run into this, so I'm not sure what else would be a good reason.

Renewing lost friendships

Thanks to Facebook, this has happened to me several times over.  I've found friends that I haven't talked to since 1998 and it's been great reconnecting with them.  With some, it's like almost 15 years haven't gone by.  I miss those friends a lot and wish that we were all closer to each other again.  I have this weird idea in my head that we should have a sleepover like we did "back in the day" and kind of relive those memories.  I'm hoping to see one friend again in the next couple of years.

I am woman, hear me roar!

So often I heard women shouldn't be in the military.  So what?  Here's what I think:  Would you rather have someone who can stand hours upon hours of pain for the good of new life or someone who cries at the smallest water cramp?  ;) My mother was in the service, my sister was in the service, and I was in the service.  We're all proud of what we've done for our country.  One of us worked with planes, one of us worked with missile guidance systems for the Tomahawk missiles, and one of us worked [alongside] engineers. I am woman, hear me roar!

What I hold dear..

Something I have that I hold very dear that others may not care about are my journals.  I've been writing in them since I was 12 years old and I'm 30 now.  Those journals remind me of how I was growing up, memories that I'd forgotten about.  I would lose a part of myself if I lost those.

My dad always...

This one has me stumped.  I only recently got in touch with my real dad.  ("Recently" means that last ten years.)  I've only seen him twice in the last five years.  He's in Columbus, Ohio and we're west of him.  We don't talk on the phone often; we should.  We text and email more often than we phone each other. What I do know is that I love him so much.  I wish we were able to spend more time together when I was growing up.  The guy my mother married when I was still a baby is a grade-A asshole and I want nothing to do with him.  I haven't called him "dad" in about ten years.  I love my real dad.  It sucks that I can't see him more often.

It's Kismet

When two rivers meet, it's like the joining of hands.. the joining of hearts.  It's a natural hand-fasting, no ritual needed.  It.  Just.  Is.

Rosemary, Arnica, Dogwood Bark

Image
The Healer sent me into the woods today.  She needed her herbs replenished and I offered to go.  Now that I'm here, I don't think I'll make it back.  I feel like I'm stuck in these woods now, waiting to become a part of it.  I can feel my feet, bare skin, sinking into the ground and standing firm.  My arms are stretching out toward the trees and my eyes are affixed on the sky above me.  The sky seems to be getting closer, my limbs now seeming stiff.  Instead of looking around me, I explore with the sensations my body is going through with my senses.  It seems as though I'm becoming one with them. I knew I was different from the others.  I felt closer with nature than my friends ever did.  It seems that the Healer knew this, too.  She told me when I was younger that I was/am a Dryad.  I didn't believe her.  I guess, now I do.

My characters thus far

Isis-  Isis is a character I created for an RPG called EarthDawn.  I played this game with a couple of my friends and made new friends in the process.  She's an Elf with onyx skin (just as shiny, too), silver eyes, and her hair was blue and purple.  She was tall, thin, and cold as ice.  She was an Elemental mage.  She's one of my favorite character creations.  I sometimes play her when I'm back in town with those friends. Jayde Azure - She's one of my characters from ShadowRun.  It's a combination cyber punk/fantasy RPG.  This is another mage, with some cyberware.  She doesn't have much, though; if she did, her magic wouldn't work anymore.  Her father is CEO of Aztechnology in South America.  She decided to go out into the world to see what she could do.  Daddy didn't like it and now she has to keep an eye out for his henchmen whenever she has a Run. Ezraiya Dune-  Ezraiya "Ezzy" Dune was created for another RPG (role playing game).  This g

A TV show...

If my family were a reality tv show, which one would it be? That's hard to say.  My life is pretty dull compared to some.  We (hubby and I) go to work, we come home, we eat dinner.  I go to class and he does his online classes.  Our daughter still gets up around the same time every day, she has a bowl of cereal or oatmeal (two packages), watches cartoons (hub, Cartoon Network, PBS Kids) until hubby gets home.  Hubby and I stay up late doing homework or just hanging out in our bedroom watching television until the sleep timer goes off.  The next morning, it all starts again. Like I said, pretty dull. However, my husband is able to make anything fun and interesting.  He's able to keep my attention and keep me laughing.  When it comes to him, my life is never dull. My daughter also makes me laugh.  Whether it's how she's falls asleep or telling me what she learned on Sid the Science Kid ("Did you hear the one about the kid who wanted to know everything about e

I colored my hair

I had a coupon for Clairol Nice and Easy hair color and bought a pretty strawberry blonde color.  I did it yesterday and it turned out really nice.  After my hair dried, I noticed that I missed a spot, but it's hardly noticeable.  I already had similar tones in my hair so it seemed a natural choice. Patrick didn't notice it at first.  My hair was pulled back; doing this makes it hard to see any change in color.  He'd also been at work all day and was focusing on his homework. I wasn't worried that he didn't see it.  He had other things on his mind.  I fixed this later. I love the color and I think it suits me very well.

What makes me feel safe

When my husband holds me tight and tells me that everything will be okay is when I feel safe.  So long as he's there, everything is fine.

Funny family stories

There are many stories on both mine and my husband's side of the family.  He's told me a few funny stories when he and his ex-wife were together.  There are a couple from our life together so far.  I'm actually really bad about pulling some memories out, so this isn't going to be the best response to an inspired prompt.

The last time I cried

The last time I cried.. I don't remember.  More than likely, it was from watching a sappy movie.  I know a cry is good for you every now and again. Hmmmm...

A first date worth remembering

I don't remember the first date I ever had.  I do however remember the first day of the rest of my life.  Yeah, I know, it sounds uber cheesy, but it's the truth. The first date my husband and I ever had happened to be in Hawai'i.  We were both stationed on the same ship at the time and on a Western Pacific deployment (WestPac).  We were on our way home from this deployment and we moored to the pier just outside of Waikiki.  I'd made reservations (using a voucher from the Fun Boss on the ship) at a tourist spot hotel.  There was a Denny's across the street where we ate lunch after checking in.  It was pouring down rain almost the entire time we were there. We went to dinner that night at a Chinese restaurant.  The place was practically empty.  Unfortunately, he got really sick and my poor love spent the evening in the head or trying to lay comfortably on the bed (come to think of it, I think it was the same room my friend and I stayed in on our way out on our de

A story prompt today

I stood at the back door waiting for the sun to set.  I was hoping for the night to come.  I need to draw down the moon's power to infuse my body with her light.  It seemed like the night would never come.  Patience helped me wait it out and at long last, the sky was dark, the stars were out, and the moon was shining in her pregnant glory. I stood out in the field, my arms outstretched, basking in the light that shone down upon me.  I chanted the Goddess invocation and allowed the vibrations of the earth to surge right through me.  My energy was renewed. I felt like a new woman and I was ready to take on whatever lay ahead of me.

My Writing Goal

I want to write one book.  Just one.  I want it published by Penguin Publishing or Tor or somebody who publishes my favorite authors.  I've been working on a story since 2004.  I keep getting more ideas for it and then I write and write and then I stop.  Life happens to keep me from working on it more.  Work keeps me busy, as well as school; not to mention my Belladonna. One day I will finish it.  Those who've read it so far are anxiously waiting to read more.  It's been awhile since they read anything, but I know they haven't forgotten.  They really like the story.  I just need to finish it.  I also need to find it.  I'm hoping that I still have it located on the laptop I'm currently using.

Really, Mom?

I don't think my mother realizes that we have different priorities and different things going on than my sister. It seems as though my sister will always have a good opportunity to get photos of my nephew done.  That's great as I enjoy seeing pictures of him.  However, it feels like my mother is hounding me for "professional" pictures of my daughter.  "I like the silly ones, but..." is what I see a lot from her on Facebook. I'm sorry I don't get photos of my daughter all the time.  Yes, I married a photographer, but we have busy lives with work and school full time.  Doing professional photos of our daughter for my mother (or anyone else in our extended family) are not our top priority.  She's also asking for recent pictures of my bonus son.  The most recent pictures WE HAVE are from our last visit almost three years ago. I really wish she'd stop.  It seems like she's comparing me to my sister.  Maybe it's just me over-reacting,

Feeling guilty (today's prompt)

Sometimes I feel guilty when I want to hang out outside of the home with friends.  Then again, while I do have friends here, there isn't the extra cash flow to do those things.  I don't think I spend enough time at home with my family.  I shouldn't want to go out and away from them and I feel guilty when I do.

I allow myself

I allow myself the freedom to be me.  I'm the only one like me and there is pride in that. I started wearing glitter to work every day a few months ago.  Now, my customers can't wait to see what I do.  They love to see how I've done my eye makeup for the day.  This helps me to stand out to be me.  There are others who do fun things with their eye makeup at work, but apparently, I stand out.  This makes me happy and I feel good.

Neurotic?

A characteristic that I have that resembles my mother.. I'm not even sure where to start.

The importance of friends

My friends are incredibly important to me.  They accept and love me no matter what.  My husband is my best friend.

A story?

Image
I have no idea what kind of story this could be.  I'm not -that- creative.

Enjoyable time with The Girl, Bella

One of my favorite times with Bella was actually a day when we weren't feeling very well.  We snuggled and cuddled all day.  I think she fell asleep on me at one point. I miss her falling asleep on me.  She did it so much when she was a baby.  Sometimes I miss her being a baby.

At the check-out line

I posted this on a social networking site and the comments took the post in a direction I had not intended.  So, I'm "moving" the original post here, along with only my comments (edited). One thing that cashiers in any store would love for customers to have is etiquette at the check-out line.   Oftentimes, customers are on the phone having a conversation while the cashier is trying to do their job.  They can't do it accurately unless they're able to talk and conversate with you.  Please, put down the phone (tell the person on the other end you'll call them back) and respond to your cashier. Also, some cashiers are just naturally bubbly and in a good mood.  If you're having a bad day or are in a bad mood, the cashier can tell and they want to help you make your day a better one.  Not all cashiers are like this, but I am.  It actually hurts my feelings a bit when I ask, "Hi there!  How are you today?" and all I get is a grunt and a sour puss fac